The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

by Totally Knuts

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about

I was inspired to write a parody of The Whiskey, The Liar, The Thief by Patent Pending after reading The Doctor, The Monster, and The Count by Illuminescence on AO3.
archiveofourown.org/works/52389508

Huge thanks to Millie for the cover art!

lyrics

He was a Bethlam doctor
And worked with the insane
His research was the id and of the brain
His patients would come in, his patients would go out
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

He had taken as a lover
A princess long ago
About a couple hundred years or so
He said he’d battle God for her, he couldn’t live without
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

Dr Jeffrey turns to evil Mr Horne
Who wishes Jeffrey never had been born
Together they are Alex ‘cause they just can’t get around it
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

When Gregor came to Bethlem
It was love at first sight
Though the first sight, it had happened years ago
Jeffrey thought all along that his nightmares had been wrong
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

They dance around the ballroom just to see
If, just in case, the two of them could be
In love across time and across their country lines
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

A single crimson flower
Would be the final key
To see that Jeffrey’s research was complete
He trusted that one flower just to give him all the power
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

The hunters came for Gregor in the end
He’d always be a monster, not their friend
But the power of love made Gregor rise above
And Alex understood that their love was for good
They would never part, they were connected at the heart
The Doctor, The Monster, The Count

credits

released January 18, 2024

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Totally Knuts Fremont, California

I am a nonbinary wizard who writes inclusive wizard rock! And also other nerdy stuff. Logo by Brenna Doe.

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